In my short experience as a counselor, I really enjoyed doing premarital counseling. I believe in the importance of that time of preparation for a healthy start to a marriage. I now think there needs to be a new form of counseling introduced: Premothering Counseling. I am blown away at how little I know about being a mother! I have not been around a lot of babies so I knew there was a lot to learn about feeding, caring for, etc. But, I am now beginning to think that will be the easy stuff compared to everything else I have to learn!
I took part in a Bible study with my church last semester called Motherwise, thinking that it would be beneficial to me as I learned how to be a mother. I loved the study and being with other mothers but I always left the study with an even greater awareness of how little I know! Sure I can learn about his development and basic care techniques from a book or another mom but what about the other things? I can handle a scraped knee but I am not sure how to “kiss away” the sadness that comes a friend that is mean, his first failure, when he has to make a decision when experiencing peer pressure, when life just isn’t fair…all of the events in life that are inevitable but still hard.
I tripped over some steps a few days ago (still not remembering to adjust to a pregnant body). I was completely fine and my husband caught me before I hit more than a shin so there was no reason for alarm, just embarrassment. But afterwards I couldn’t quite shake it off and I realized it was because I was so upset that I could have caused my baby any harm. I even wondered if it had scared him when I fell, knowing full well that medical knowledge would say no. I caused me to think about how I will react to the times that I can’t prevent him getting hurt, physically or emotionally. I know that those times will happen and I also know that he has the chance to be a better person from how he learns from those things happening. But I am already learning that as a mama, logical thinking doesn’t mean as much when your child is hurting.
I have so much to learn! I only have about 3 months left before the big test arrives and there are no retakes. Still, the most important lesson I learned from Motherwise is how I can find the wisdom a mother needs. I have a perfect heavenly Father that not only knows me but he knows and loves my son and has promised to meet all of our needs.