A Big Role

I recently attended a youth retreat. I'm not even sure how many of these I have been to now in the last few years. In many ways it was the same as the others...but in other ways it was one of the better experiences in my life.

This was largely to do with all of the opportunities to get to do what I love to do in life. I got to speak, teach a small group, play the piano for worship with my husband and spend time with some great young women as they needed me. All of those things (maybe besides the piano part...though that even counts because I was helping my husband with what he is called to do) are areas that I know God gifted me in and it is just fun to get to do what I was created to do. Sometimes it is hard and I think to myself that it would be a lot easier to be a secretary instead of a counselor. But it is so rewarding and God always has carried me through even when it hurts. I was emotionally worn out from this retreat but what a cool time. I might write later on my thoughts on what I spoke on.

The standout from this weekend came when I had a teenager ask me to be her "big sister in Christ." She is a sweet girl that I have known for a few years and honored me with her trust this past weekend. As I have thought on it more it has reminded me of my "big sisters" in the past. I can remember them from as young as being in sixth grade and they have continued. Remembering them has humbled me that I am now in that position but on an even deeper level now because of the time spent with this girl. I thought those older girls were so wise and almost perfect. How then do I fit into that role? If anything, it has made me spend more time praying for that young girl. It has also made me desire to still have that big sister. A problem with seminary is falling into a belief that I have a lot of knowledge...and I do compared to a lot of people at church merely because I have studied many books and sat through numerous lectures. But, what I lack is wisdom and that is far more important than knowledge. As I have thought on it, I am going to begin to look for an older woman who can be that role for me.